Co-Hosting

So Ellen....I am not sure if you have thought about this before but how would you feel having a co-host? I am willing to do this for you. My roommate and I were just sitting here watching your show and she turned to me and said, "You know what I wanted to put in your birthday card but didn't?" Naturally I said, "What?" She said, "I really think you are going to replace Ellen one day on her show. But she needs to meet you first for this to happen." But I am not looking to take over your show, so I think we should just partner up.But we have to meet first and  I would LOVE to meet you but you still haven't come over for dinner yet so I'm not sure how this is going to happen. I truly believe from the bottom of my heart that you and I would make the bestest friends ever but you have to give me a chance for this to happen. In order to convince you to meet me, I am currently teaching Harriet, my bird, the cutest bird there is, to say Ellen. So let's make a deal.....if Harriet learns to say Ellen, you have to be my best friend. Deal? Great.